As you prepare your holiday cards for family and friends, one of the big questions is whether or not to include a Christmas letter, describing what you and your family have been up to over the past year.

Opinions on the Christmas letter are mixed.  Some people find them a handy way to keep in touch with rarely seen friends.  Others think they are boring, bragging, or just plain unnecessary.

I get several Christmas letters a year and, for the most part, I like them.  I like knowing what is happening in the lives of people I care about. (If you truly don’t care about these people, I do wonder why you still exchange holiday cards.)  If you decide to send a Christmas letter, here are some things to keep in mind:

• People’s attention span maxes out at two pages unless there are lots of pictures.
• An unsigned photocopied Christmas poem in an envelope with a computer-generated label is not a Christmas greeting to a personal acquaintance unless there are disability issues involved.
• Make sure that it’s reasonable to assume that the people reading your letter know who you’re talking about.  If not, identify the cast of characters clearly.  It is entirely possible that Great Aunt Tish or your college roommate Genevieve may not be entirely clear as to whether Molly is your pet schnauzer or your son’s fiance. (If she’s both, reading this blog may not be the best use of your time.  Surely Dr. Phil is on some channel right now.)
• Humor can add a lot to a letter.  But keep in mind that it’s really hard to pull off a gimmick, such as having your pet iguana act as the author.  I’ve had some friends do that with great success. Others, not so much.
• Be honest.  Don’t overinflate the good things or lie about the bad.  These are people you care about. They want to share your joys and your sorrows.  Plus, if they are close enough to you to be on the Christmas card list, you may run into them or you’ll have a mutual acquaintance.  Eventually, the truth will bubble to the surface.  It’s your life. Own it.
• Please don’t brag.  I want you to be happy.  Really.  I want you to take pride in your children’s accomplishments, whether it’s scoring her first goal in soccer or winning a prize for his finger painting. (Do NOT diss the finger painting.  To this day the only artistic award I’ve every won was for a kindergarten finger painting.  It is a source of great pride.) Still, I don’t need to know about every option on your brand new fully loaded SUV, the GIA certification of the diamond in your new ring, or the details of your little one’s toilet training.
• On the reverse side, don’t let your letter become an unremitting list of woes. If it was a bad year, say so and let folks know what happened.  They may not be aware of job losses or health issues and can become sources of support.  But please don’t whine.  Two pages of someone telling you why his or her life is miserable gets old fast.  Instead, talk about some good things, the things that give you hope in the days ahead.
• If you get a real whopper of a letter, email it to me and I’ll blog excerpts (changing names and locations as needed, of course!